Election re-do -- most voters say YES

Satire from Ted Block

AROUND THE BLOCK

News with a Twist

Poll: 74% of voters favor election ‘do-over’

Margin in 3 states that swung the election even bigger

In a just released Around the Block poll, after only one year of the Trump presidency 74% of Americans who participated in the 2016 presidential election said they favor an election “do-over” between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton.

Not surprisingly, 98% of Democrats want a do-over. But a stunning 54% of Republicans agree that the election should be held again. The 2% of Democrats who are against the do-over would only support one if the Democratic candidate was Bernie Sanders, not Hillary Clinton.

The poll results in the three key states that swung the election to Trump by less than 80,000 votes combined – Michigan (+10,702), Pennsylvania (+46,765) and Wisconsin (+22,177) – were particularly revealing with 84% of Michiganders, 79% of Pennsylvanians and 81% of Wisconsinites favoring another election.

Summing up the feeling in one of those states, Sam Schlitz, a registered Republican from Green Bay, Wisconsin said, “Youse gotta believe we Cheeseheads are embarrassed by what we did. It was just a couple-two-three votes, right? For cripes sake we had finally gotten over that McCarthy was from the Badger state and now we’re responsible for this. You-Betcha we want another chance.”

Added Wilbur “Soapy” Williams, a Republican from Battle Creek, Michigan, “Look-it, we had no idea what we were doing, not like we yoosta. I should have known when that guy with the funny accent knocked on my door to tell me all those bad things about Hillary I shouldn’t have listened to him. I mean when I asked him if he wanted a pop he said “da!”

And finally, Republican Pete Pfeifinger of Blue Ball, Pennsylvania said, "Trump, that's a whole nother issue. As soon as I saw him eat a cheesesteak with a knife and fork I knew I shoulda voted for Hillary."