***NEW FEATURE*** AROUND THE BLOCK PLAYS CLASSIC GAME SHOWS

Satire from Ted Block 

AROUND THE BLOCK

Plays Classic Game Shows

“What’s My Line”: 

ATB Edition

Today, we take a completely new tack at Around the Block. Introducing Around the Block – Plays Classic Game Shows. And, for for our first classic game show we offer the popular 1950’s era CBS panel show What’s My Line, which was hosted by the pioneering TV newscaster, John Charles Daly.

L to R: Arlene Francis, Bennett Cerf, Dorothy Kilgallen, John Charles Daly

Unfortunately, since Mr. Daly, along with regular panelists Arlene Frances, Dorothy Kilgallen and Bennett Cerf have all passed away and this is a column not an actual TV show, we’ll have to play What’s My Line: ATB Edition with a slightly different set of rules: 

a) Unlike the TV panelists, you won’t be blindfolded so the guest’s face will be revealed to you; and

b) We’ll start off with a multiple-choice question to warm you up and help you identify the guest. If you correctly answer the multiple-choice question you can go on to the next step where the guest will give you clues to help in the identification. 

Now remember, unlike John Charles Daly, I’m not there with you so I’m counting on you – no cheating!

With those rules in mind – it’s time to play What’s My Line: ATB Edition!!

WHO AM I?

Part 1: Multiple Choice Question 

1. I’m the “before” model for the “As Seen on TV” Under-Eye Bag Removal Cream. 
2. I played Elphaba, the Wicked Witch of the West, in the Tucson Ridiculous Theatrical Company's production of Wicked. 
3. I am Barron Trump's evil Nanny.
4. Could be all of the above or none of the above.

Ok, you have 30-seconds…….

And the answer is #4 “Could be all of the above or none of the above.” 

If you chose #4 you can now go on to the What’s My Line: ATB Edition traditional clue segment.

1. While working for the Auto Club (AAA) in Tucson, Arizona, I was fired for filing false claims for travel and other expenses. Who am I?
2. While working for an advertising agency in Arizona, I was fired for plagiarism. Who am I?
3. That plagiarism included creating a client website in which I lifted, verbatim, material from the job at AAA from which I was fired. Who am I?
4. I was arrested for driving under the influence twice and placed into a court-ordered treatment program. Who am I?
5. As spokesperson for the Arizona attorney general’s office, I fielded press inquiries about a botched execution by the state by describing the condemned prisoner, who did not die for nearly two hours after being given a lethal injection, as “snoring” and the scene in the execution chamber as “quite peaceful.” Who am I?
6. I was appointed to the combined roles as White House Press Secretary and Communications director nearly two months ago but, in that time, I have not held a single on-camera briefing with the media. Who am I?

Ok, you have 30 seconds…….

 

And the answer is Stephanie Grisham, who was promoted from Melania Trump’s spokesperson to White House Communications Director and Press Secretary on July 1.

Now in the TV What's My Line, after the guest's identity is revealed, Mr. Daly would spend a few minutes interviewing her. Since Mr. Daly is no longer with us, ATB will conduct the interview.

ATB: Now let me get this straight, you got this White House job despite your resume?

Grisham: They never asked for my resume.

ATB: Well, did they have any questions or ask about your background? 

Grisham: Not really, they just asked me if I'd like to work in the White House and if I had any questions for them. 

ATB: Did you have any questions?

Grisham: Actually, yes I had one question. I had just seen a production of the musical The Producers and I remembered a question that Max Bialystock asked, so I decided to ask that one. 

ATB: And the question was?

Grisham: Who do you have f**k to get a job around here?

ATB: You actually asked that?

Grisham: Yes, and guess what, the interviewer smiled and said, "Just wait, we have exactly the right person in mind."

ATB: And with that, you got the job? 

Grisham: Well, I'm sitting here aren't I?

Hope you enjoyed playing What’s My Line: ATB Editon. Now until next week, some closing thoughts: 

• Based on her background and job performance to date, Stephanie Grisham could be the poster child for Donald Trump's claim, "I only hire the best people; I only have the best people."

• Stephanie Grisham's reason for not having any on-camera briefings in the time she’s been White House Press Secretary is because she “doesn’t need to hold briefings because the president is so accessible to reporters himself.” 
• Based on the last two weeks of Trump’s incoherent ramblings on the White House South Lawn, that strategy seems to be working out well.

• Grisham replaced Sarah Huckabee “Colonel” Sanders as Press Secretary. So, the good news is we won’t have to see Ms. Sanders on TV anymore. 

• Wait, what? Ms. “Colonel” Sanders just signed on to be a Fox New contributor? Does that mean we’ll still have to see her on TV? 

• Not to worry. We watch MSNBC. And you know what MSNBC says: 

WE WATCH FOX NEWS 

SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO