Trump, Giuliani, Lev Parnas, Executive Privilege and Kevin Bacon

Satire from Ted Block

AROUND THE BLOCK

Commentary

Indicted Giuliani Associate Ties Case to Trump

He can’t talk because…you guessed it: EXECUTIVE PRIVILEGE!

Lev Parnas leaving Courthouse with 4th Wife Honey (or Bunny)

The New York Times reported today that, “one of the two indicted associates of President Trump’s personal lawyer, Rudolph W. Giuliani, on Wednesday tied the case to the president himself, saying that some of the evidence gathered in the campaign-finance investigation could be subject to executive privilege.”

Lev Parnas, a Ukrainian-born U.S. “businessman” and Palm Beach County neighbor (Boca Raton), through his lawyer, Ed McMahon (really, I kid you not…wait that was Jack Paar’s line, not Johnny’s) told the judge in the case that “the potential for the White House to invoke executive privilege stemmed from the fact that Mr. Parnas had used Mr. Giuliani as his own lawyer at the same time Mr. Giuliani was working as Mr. Trump’s lawyer.” 

Interestingly, Trump claims he doesn’t know who Parnas is despite the dozens of pictures with Parnas and Donald “Everyone Wants a Picture with Me” Trump.

Our sources have indicated that McMahon’s argument is based on the Kevin Bacon Department of Justice “Six Degrees of Separation” rule recently written by Attorney General and one of Trump’s “Three Toadieteers*,” William “Lower the Bar” Barr. 

To lend more credence to the argument, McMahon has directed his paralegal, Doc Severinsen, to subpoena Bacon and have him appear as a friendly witness.

Bacon, coming off his recent success as Jackie Rohr, the profane, corrupt Boston-based FBI agent in the hit Showtime series, City on a Hill, told Around the Block, “What, are you f-ing kidding? I ain’t testifying for anyone. I’m claiming my own executive privilege – I was in Oliver Stone’s JFK for God’ sake; that qualifies, doesn’t it.”

*The Three Toadieteers: Mike "Can I Stop Standing Behind Trump Looking Like a Toadie?" Pence, Mike "I Don't Understand Why Everyone in the State Department Hates Me" Pompeo, and, of course, William "Lower the Bar" Barr.