Trump going overseas to unite the world -- reaction mixed

Satire from Ted Block

AROUND THE BLOCK

News with a Twist

Trump’s 1^st overseas trip: Saudi Arabia, Israel and the Pope in Rome – as well as G7 in Sicily and NATO in Brussels

Hopes to also meet Don Corleone in Sicily; will decide later if NATO is “not obsolete anymore”

The Washington Post reported today that President Trump, on his first trip abroad, will travel later this month to Saudi Arabia, Israel and Rome, in that order, in an effort to unite three of the world’s leading religious faiths in the common cause of fighting terrorism, reining in Iran, and “unifying the world against intolerance.”

The trip, during which officials said Trump would meet with Pope Francis, will be followed by Trump’s attendance at the G7 conference of world economic powers, held in Sicily, and a meeting of NATO leaders in Brussels.

Commenting on the trip, White House spokesman Sean Spicer told reporters that the president is particularly thrilled about the G7 conference in Sicily where he hopes to not only lecture the G7 delegates on business and economics but also bring each delegate a signed copy of his “best-selling” book, The Art of the Deal.

According to Spicer, the president “can’t imagine” the conference will take up a lot of time – “after all, how much time do they need for me to tell them how to fix all the world’s economic problems,” Spicer reported the president said – so he’s also scheduled a visit with Don Vito Corleone to discuss the environmental impact of modern garbage management techniques as well as the health benefits of olive oil.

Regarding the NATO visit to Brussels, Spicer indicated that the president is not sure yet whether he will tell NATO members whether the alliance is obsolete or not. “Quite frankly, the president’s opinion on NATO really depends on whom he talked to last. Remember, he said that NATO was ‘not obsolete anymore’ after speaking to the NATO secretary-general. There’s quite a bit of time and a lot of people to talk to before the trip, so everything is on the table,” Spicer said.

Reaction to the president’s trip to Saudi Arabia, Israel and Rome was quick.

A spokesman for Israeli prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu said, “Israel is thrilled that our good friend and ally, President Donald Trump, has chosen Israel to be part of his first overseas trip but we have asked the president to change his itinerary and visit Israel first, not Saudi Arabia.”

For their part, the Saudis, aware of the Israeli request for an itinerary change, were honored to be “the first country President Trump will visit” and indicated that any change in the itinerary order that puts Israel first will “seriously affect our presence at any bargaining table.”

A Vatican spokesman, speaking about Trump's rather contentious relation with the Pope – Trump accused the Pope of being "manipulated" by the Mexican government, while the Pope has said Trump is "not Christian" – said, "Not even the Heavenly Father knows how this meeting will turn out."